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  • Writer's pictureShondalae Benson

The Love Letters of John

When I first heard about the idea of reading sections of the Bible 30 times in a row I wanted to start with John’s letters because they are about love.I wanted a greater understanding of what the Bible says about it.


Love can mean so many different things in our culture. We use it casually to talk about our shoes and our cars. We use it to talk about our family members or friends that are like family. And we use it to talk about romance. One word, so many meanings. In Greek there are three words for love in the Bible. Phileo is the love of friendship and eros is romantic love. Agape is the “attitude of God toward His Son [and] the human race” and used most often throughout the Bible. Its primary focus is on God and His commandments. It “seeks the welfare of all and works no ill to any.” It is not just a feeling, but also an action based on reason (Strong’s 26). John talks about agape.


John is passionate about relationship, both with God and with each other. His whole goal of writing his letters is so that “we may have fellowship” with other believers and “with the Father and with his Son, Jesus Christ” (1 John 1:3). He writes to believers, people he loves and delights in. He says, “We write this to make our joy complete” (1 John 1:4). His greatest joy is that we walk “in the truth” - in God’s commands (2 John 1:4, 3 John 1:4).


John’s primary focus is about what it is like to be in the love of God. In chapter 3 of his first letter he beautifully writes, “See what great love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are!” (v. 1). Other translations might say what love God has bestowed, shown, given, but some, like the NIV here, say lavished. What a wonderful word! God doesn’t just give us love. He lavishes it on us.


After his introduction, John starts his first letter by laying down what is required for us to have fellowship and love. He says, “God is light; in him there is no darkness at all. If we claim to have fellowship with him and yet walk in the darkness, we lie and do not live out the truth. But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus, his Son, purifies us from all sin” (1:5-7).


The Greek word for light is phós which is used not just for rays of light but luminousness, says Strong’s. And it’s the source of light, “the nature of God.” I like how HELPS Word-Studies puts it: They call it radiance. “The manifestation of God's self-existent life; divine illumination to reveal and impart life, through Christ” (5457). Imagine that! We who choose fellowship with God get to walk in radiance! Only this year, as I handed my life over to true obedience and fellowship with God, have I truly understood what this radiance is. It is indescribable and fills me with such incredible peace and joy.


I’ve thought a lot about what this feels like. Although words are insignificant, I think this gives a decent impression:


All the delight and joy we find in our mortal life, in each other, and in the beauty we see in this world is nothing compared to what we have with God.The glory of a sunset, of a flower, of a baby’s laugh, has no comparison to the surpassing glory of the Creator. Amazingly, this incredible being loves us and shares his light with us. He IS light, the very definition, being and source of light. And he gives this light to us, cherishing us, delighting in and rejoicing in us. I marvel at the thought that someone so perfect takes so much pride and pleasure in us.


Nothing exists without him. All the goodness in the world, anything beneficial and pleasing, flows from him, from his love, his light. He created a perfect world to sustain us and fill us in the most beneficial way possible. It is all for our best, our benefit. In that love and light is such incredible kindness; it is spread through and present in every part of his nature. He is so gentle. His friendship is delightful and entrancing.


The sweetness of fellowship is indescribable. When I am fully with him and not distracted by this world, I feel more alive than at any other time. To be so close to the one from whom my life flows is like being immersed in pure radiance. It flows through me and my heart soars. I feel as if I have wings. My soul knows no bounds. I know complete and total peace as I walk with him, dwell with him and fellowship with him. He is filled with grace and gentleness and oh so tender. My heart lacks for nothing, longs for nothing.


John talks more about what is required to have this fellowship with him, but first I want to talk about loving people, John’s other favorite subject. The most famous passage in 1 John is probably this. “Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God. Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love. This is how God showed his love among us: He sent his one and only Son into the world that we might live through him. This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins. Dear friends, since God so loved us, we also ought to love one another. No one has ever seen God; but if we love one another, God lives in us and his love is made complete in us” (4:7-12).


Loving each other is impossible without loving God. God IS love (4:8, 16); therefore we cannot love without God. But if we have God, because God is love, then we will love each other. If we don’t, we don’t love God. “Anyone who loves their brother and sister lives in the light… But anyone who hates a brother or sister is in the darkness and walks around in the darkness“ (2:10-11a). The Greek word for hate, miseó, can also mean “love less” (3404). Strong’s says it “basically means having a relative preference for one thing over another , by way of expressing either aversion from, or disregard for, the claims of one person or thing relatively to those of another. “


In other words, it’s not just intense and passionate dislike. Loving less means putting the wants of ourselves above the needs of others. It means selfishness, using people, hurting people and all the things that are opposite of love. The Bible says “Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres” (1 Corinthians 13:4-7). Several of these words in English are pale comparisons compared to the Greek, but that’s a subject for a different time.


Another clearcut description of love the Bible has is the fruit of the Spirit. It’s not plural. It’s one fruit which means that all nine attributes listed co-exist with each other and basically work as one multi-faceted action. “The fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control” (Galatians 5:22-23). These are the things that work together with love. Again, they are pale comparisons to the Greek, especially goodness and kindness, but it gives us an idea.


1 John 3 talks more about defining love. “This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us. And we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers and sisters… Dear children, let us not love with words or speech but with actions and in truth” (16:18). Looking at the context with the word hate including “to love less,” we know this means putting others first. It means sacrificing our own needs and wants to fulfill the needs of others. But it doesn’t mean to enable others. Ephesians 4:28, tells people they “must work, doing something useful with their own hands, that they may have something to share with those in need.”


It’s crucial that we understand that to have God, to walk in light and love others, we MUST walk with God in obedience. In John 1:3-10 John explains several things with blunt caution. Christ came “so that he might take away our sins. And in him is no sin.” Therefore, “All who have this hope in him purify themselves, just as he is pure… No one who lives in him keeps on sinning. No one who continues to sin has either seen him or known him... Anyone who does not do what is right is not God’s child, nor is anyone who does not love their brother and sister.” If we want fellowship and relationship with God we must remember verse 24, “The one who keeps God’s commands lives in him, and he in them.”


As with everywhere else, there are verses in John’s letters that are taken out of context or missing depth of meaning, especially, “If anyone acknowledges that Jesus is the Son of God, God lives in them and they in God” (4:15). The Greek word here for acknowledge, homologeó, is not just about agreeing something is true. It means “to assent” and “covenant.” It’s “allegiance to Christ” and being a “loyal follower” (3670). HELPS says, “to align with (endorse).” It’s not just acknowledging, it’s about following.


John says, “We know that we have come to know him if we keep his commands. Whoever says, ‘I know him,’ but does not do what he commands is a liar, and the truth is not in that person. But if anyone obeys his word, love for God is truly made complete in them… Whoever claims to live in him must live as Jesus did” (2:3-6).


In his third letter he tells us again, “Anyone who does what is good is from God. Anyone who does what is evil has not seen God” (3 John 1:11). He elaborates in his second letter. “And this is love: that we walk in obedience to his commands… Watch out that you do not lose what we have worked for… Anyone who… does not continue in the teaching of Christ does not have God” (1:8-9). This is so crucial he says, “If anyone comes to you and does not bring this teaching, do not take them into your house or welcome them. Anyone who welcomes them shares in their wicked work” (2 John 1:6-11). This is one of the reasons we are told to disassociate with people who claim to be Christians but do not follow God.


If we don’t obey God, we are not walking in the light and are in darkness. The Greek word for darkness, skotos, includes moral darkness (4655). It is separation from God. It saps our life, our strength, our soul. When I chose the ways of this world instead of the ways of God, I found that darkness. It was slow and gradual. One small step that eventually led to such emptiness. I did my best to put into words what it felt like.


At first it seems like nothing. That one glance, that lingering look, that step. I am not completely lost in the darkness immediately. I did not collapse into it and cease to experience the light the moment I took that first step. But I am dying. My body is slowly having the life sucked out of it minute by minute, hour by hour, day by day. The rest of my mortal life on earth lengthened out in agony. I have entered a state of entropy that will continue until it is a hollow shell laid in the ground and buried to dissolve and become one with the wretched earth.


Darkness is an essence. It wants to pull you in and make you its own. It surrounds you with its fingers constantly tugging, urging you to follow its path. I resist. But it is so enticing and I take another step. And another. And another. The more I walk in the darkness, the more the light is pushed out of my existence. I fall in it, am lost in it, consumed by it. Until something in me breaks and I finally realize how far I’ve gone.


Those things that drew me into darkness, that buried my connection with the light, that enticed me and mimicked the love and light of the creator, once gone, leave an emptiness beyond description. It floods my awareness. I know nothing else. I feel as if my soul is being ripped out. My heart aches, but I can’t pull myself out. I cannot think; I cannot breathe. Anguish. Despair. Agony. My heart aches, split and torn, but I can’t pull myself out.


The world is enticing. It is so easy to get drawn into it, whether it’s inherently unhealthy things like greed and sexual immorality or inherently healthy things like family, friendships and hobbies. John writes, “Do not love the world or anything in the world. If anyone loves the world, love for the Father is not in them. For everything in the world—the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life—comes not from the Father but from the world. The world and its desires pass away, but whoever does the will of God lives forever” (2:15-17). The “love” used for loving the world is agapa which means love and beloved (25). It doesn’t just mean to follow God, it also means to long for and take pleasure in (Biblehub.com). In other words, not only does immorality draw us away from God and into darkness, anything that becomes more important to us than God does as well.


It’s easy to deceive ourselves and try to walk only partly with God. We can convince ourselves it’s okay if we have just one recurring sin. One problem area. One little thing we do. Or maybe even one big thing we do that we feel we can’t overcome, so we stop fighting thinking it’s okay because God always forgives us. But Hebrews 10 says, “If we deliberately keep on sinning after we have received the knowledge of the truth, no sacrifice for sins is left but only a fearful expectation of judgment and of raging fire that will consume the enemies of God” (10:26-27). Jesus paid the price to cleanse us from ALL of our sin. Hebrews asks, how “severely do you think someone deserves to be punished who has trampled the Son of God underfoot, who has treated as an unholy thing the blood of the covenant that sanctified them, and who has insulted the Spirit of grace?” (10:26-29). Those are very serious words.


But if we do find ourselves walking in the darkness or even get completely lost in it, there is hope. “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness” (1:9). The Greek word for confess here, is the same as the word for acknowledge, homologeó. It does not just mean to admit. It means “allegiance” (3670). It means that we turn away from the darkness, our sin, and back to the light, to God. It means to obey God and walk in his commands.


John writes, “See that what you have heard from the beginning remains in you. If it does, you also will remain in the Son and in the Father. And this is what he promised us—eternal life… continue in him, so that when he appears we may be confident and unashamed before him at his coming. If you know that he is righteous, you know that everyone who does what is right has been born of him” (1 John 2:24-26, 28-29).


It can be really hard and overwhelming to conquer sin. But we have hope. God's “commands are not burdensome, for everyone born of God overcomes the world. This is the victory that has overcome the world, even our faith” (1 John 5:3). Faith, pistis in the Greek, means credence, conviction, reliance upon and constancy. (4102). “Only the one who believes that Jesus is the Son of God” overcomes the world. (1 John 5:3-5). Belief, pisteuó, means to entrust and commit to not mere credence (4100). In other words, it’s not only accepting a statement as true, it means that we walk in that truth and give our life to it. The closer I walk with God, the less the darkness pulls at me. It always does. And sometimes the pull is so strong it’s really hard to resist. But it has less and less power over me as I walk closer to God.


Disobedience comes from fear. Fear that we will not be happy. I had a lot of fear. Fear of rejection from people. Fear of abandonment. Fear that God was disappointed in me. Fear of giving an account of myself to God (Romans 14:12), for receiving what is due me ”for the things done while in the body, whether good or bad” (2 Corinthians 5:10). And most of all, that I would never be able to let God in to the point where I was truly content with him alone, or worse, in my deepest most hidden fear, that he wasn’t capable of fulfilling me.


But love has driven out my fear. John has some deeply rich descriptions of God’s love. “God is love. Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in them. This is how love is made complete among us so that we will have confidence on the day of judgment… There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment” (4:16-18).


Perfect love drives out fear. There is no better word for it. I’ve come to know this so intimately this year. Once I handed over everything in my life, once I let go of that last bit of stubborn disobedience, the fear, the darkness was driven out of my heart as light flooded into it. It’s not always there. Every time I get distracted by the things of this world, I feel fear again. But I no longer excessively fear the awesomeness of God. I no longer fear standing before him and giving him an account. And the more I walk in obedience and the closer I become the less and less I fear losing or never having the things or people of this temporal world. I am filled with light.


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